it sure has been a while hasn't it.

For those of you who wonder where i am, or what i have been doing... go down 2 posts... to the one about games.

FFXI is what i have been doing for the most part.

i do not really have much to say other then that >< not right now anyway. but, i thought i would let you know. ^^;

So, I went and saw my family-in-law to be ^^

you know it is sad when people who were once strangers feel more like your family then that which you were born into. I do not really know why I am posting about the visit ^^ as the only people who read my posts happen to be part of the Gable Clan ^^ ::shrug::

It was nice seeing everyone though. Abe, the youngest actually spoke to me! (best Christmas gift he could have given, you were right Jen). And while my visit with Mr. and Mrs. Gable were short, it was nice to touch base with them again... I would like to know what Mr. Gable thinks I should be doing in college ^^ I feel like everytime he asks me what my Major is, and what I plan to do with it, he is holding back on something he wants to say = P and yes, Mr. Gable, I do know someone will probably tell you this, and you know my email =P so if you have anything to say let me know ^^

Joy, the youngest of the girls, jumped up on my lap towards the end of the movie they were watching, and hugged me till it was over and time to have dinner ^^

I did not see much of Moriah, unfortunatly... but that was my fault ^^ not hers. And I will have to be sure to visit again so I can fix that =)

Abbi and I talked for a bit, only to clear up a possible misunderstanding. I would have liked to talk to her more, see exactly where she hopes God will place her in America, how she recieves her inspirations, and for any advice on how to get more spiritually awear that she would like to give out. Youth can be wise, and I can certainly learn a lot from it ^^ Abbi, I want to make sure you know, I respect you greatly ^^

Zeke and I talked briefly, he tried to once again to convert me to Lindows... Perhaps I shall try it one day, but right now I am happy with being part of the crowd of people ignorant of Unix and its wonders ^^ Zeke, I PROMISE I will look into MySQL again, and see how realistic it would be for me to join in your... well, insane task ^^ I would like to, but I do not want to overestimate myself again ^^

Finally, Jen and I had a rather long discussion. As is normal. ^^ We departed from the rest of the family when Mr. Gable and Josh, the eldest and my fiance, started talking about technical stuff that was over our heads ^^ Once one checks out mentally, it seems only polite to check out physically as well c_c.

All sorts of things were discussed. The conversations that we have have become one of my favorite parts of any visit to New Hampshire. It is an opertunity to be challenged, and to challenge... and challenge is good. It is easy to question others, but to question oneself takes a lot of prompting at first ^^

anyway, I being vague... and I have errands to run, and there really was not a point to this post except to say that I adore you all, thanks for being there =)

~Ariel

Well, I am at home... or, what others would like me to call home ^^ Good old New Hampshire, what would i do without you ^^

Anyway, I would like to post to something that AnonymousChicka wrote on a few blogs back... She pondered as to what the point was of Idle chatter between friends, video games, and other distractions... and I have a simple, but profound answer to that ^^

They are distractions from what, for most people, would be considered a semi charmed life... 

For some like her, and her older sister SetApart, life is full of wonder, God, and purpose. However, most humenbeings, like myself for example, do not have that Fire and drive ^^ Life is not lived, but existed... and try as we may to find purpose, even in the same things that those who are purpose driven look to, we fail misserably. The chatter makes us feel important...

The games, oh... the games... This is the meat of what I will say today. Games... the are a fake world... with fake people... but they are entertainment that envolves You the player. The world might be fake, and you know this, but it is important that you be part of this world, or else it cannot progress. My favorite games are the ones that actually do depend on the player the most... Role Playing Games. They are sort of like a "choose your own adventure" book, but a game...

For example, I have recently started playing Final Fantasy XI, which is an MMORPG (massive multiplayer online role playing game). Most every character I meet, except for people in the towns, is played by someone else from Japan, USA, Canada, Britain... All over the bloody world. It is a community of Thousands. We reside in one of three great countries... We unite to fight the evil beastmen and demons that try to take over our world... We travel for hours to get to other countries and aid them, make alliances, or delcare war (comming in January). You can be one of 5 races, the Hume (humen), the Elvaan (elf), Tarutaru (little cute things, not hobbits though, but close), the Mithra (a humanoid cat race... Only female, this is what I choose), or the Galka (another animalish race, only males... big..). This character can be one of I think 16 classes, white mages (healers), monks, thiefs, ninja... just to name a few... You fight with parties, you make your character stronger, you go up against evil, and you win... you can die too... though not really... I mean, you respawn, lose some of your strength, and start over... but it can happen. Finally, to demostraight once again why it is so emersive... I can make my character laugh, smile, cry, salute, I can talk (with text) and cause dear Nasya to be whatever sort of person I want her to be ^^

I can make her what I want to be, but am unable to... This is the danger, and allure of games... It allows us to fulfill our fantasies, no matter how realistic, or unrealistic, without being in any real danger. When I am "logged" I have friends without faces, I have goals without any real meaning, but it does not seem that way... For most, it is an outlet of hopes, dreams, and desires that would be too dangerous to persue, or impossible to achieve. Perhaps, with faith, I could go heal someone who was dying, but I can heal someone by pressing [alt + 1] (when playing White mage), which is a lot less tasking. Perhaps, I could change this world if I really tried to, but I know I can make that world better by keeping someone from dying, or by defeating an evil dragon. Not that I take this, or any other game, seriously like that... But still, the point is made... I am a dreamer, not a doer... I think, but am to scared to act. I hope, but never actually believe my hopes will come true. Most people, I think, are like me... Games, movies, chitchat, let us release our hopes, dreams, ect. into the only way we feel we can accomplish them... in the minds of others ^^

So, to you, who go out and do missions, who help the needy, and who make it your lifes goal to do... Understand what the rest of us do ^^ and drag us along for one of your adventures, kicking and screaming, because you just might make a doer out of a dreamer if you do ^^

(I know this is not coherant... or a good explaination of anything ^^ but, it was the best I could come up with at this time... for more on FFXI, visit playonline.com (I think) )

bye all... time to go be what I can only dream of being ^^.